I’ve been spending precious time with Jesus this morning, savoring both the sweetness and the sorrow of Mother’s Day. Maybe it’s the stage of life I’m in … maybe it was just a mother feeling the absence of her daughter …. but yesterday was a little tough.
Oftentimes I’m too cautious when it comes to sharing the good in my life, for fear that expressing my joy could in some way unknowingly cause hurt to someone else. Maybe that’s wrong but I tend to limit the big statements with pictures plastered on Facebook. Let me just say that my husband went above and beyond celebrating me, with a depth of thoughtfulness and appreciation that just kept building from sunrise to well into the night. He honored my mother too, while silently mourning the loss of his own. I am humbled by this man who shows his affection for me daily, a life offering not just reserved for special occasions. I have done nothing to deserve him. He blesses my life in ways I can’t begin to express.
You would think with all this sweetness there’s no room for sorrow, but silly me was missing her babygirl. That’s surface stuff. I was a little emotional, but at that point I was still ok, just a mom who was missing her child who had to work on Mother’s Day. Then I walked into a room full of people. My people.
These are the ones I have worshipped with, served with, shared life with for going on 5 years. We have relationships. I know the orphan adults, those who mourn the loss of their mother. I know the adult child who is walking through the pain of watching her mom’s health slowly decline. I know the childless mother whose heart still mourns the loss of a daughter. I know the mom who has no contact with her child year after year, who still worries and hurts and wonders.
It amazes me that God has given the human heart the capacity to feel such incredible joy and gratitude and yet be so broken for others at the same time. This is simply a mystery too big for me to understand.
Teach me to number my days. Give me greater capacity to love others as You have loved me. Help me mourn with those who mourn and rejoice with those who rejoice. Let all that I am praise The Lord.